The Scare

This morning I was awaken by the doorbell ringing, which in turn makes my dog go crazy. After greeting the Fed.ex guy and hushing my dog, I went to the bathroom.
As usual, I checked the tp.
Not as usual, there was some light red blood.
Let the freakout commence.
It was about 7:30, and my doctor's office doesn't open until 8. I called the emergency number for my clinic, and they paged a doctor for me. I felt like I was going to faint or throw up, and I couldn't calm down to get dressed. What to do, what to do? I called hubby. He is usually the calm beacon for freakouts of any kind. He calmly suggested that I just drive down there, since at this point the office would open in 10 minutes, and it's about 10-15 minutes away.
good idea.
shaking, I grabbed a bottle of water and drove there. alone. Scared as hell. I told H that he didn't have to meet me there, that I would call him if I needed him. Of course, I DID need him, but I didn't know what was going to happen. There continued to be no more spotting, so I tried to imagine the best possible scenario.
This is really hard to do when you are a freak out queen about anything pregnancy related!
Then I had to wait an HOUR to see my doctor. WTH. I literally told the front desk that I was freaking out and had to see someone RIGHT NOW.
When the nurse finally took me in the back, where they take your blood pressure and what not, I started crying. She asked me if I felt movement, and I'm not entirely sure what I have felt IS movement, so I shook my head and wondered if I ever would.
I thought about the night before, after my shower, when I looked in the mirror and vainly wondered how big I was going to get and if my body would ever be the same again. Stupid. Who cares about stretchmarks? Just let my baby be healthy and my body do what it needs to do to sustain that.
Hubby called me when I was undressed and waiting. (again.) he calmed me down, and said he just knew everything would be okay.
My doctor finally came in, and reassured me that these things happen, and that it would be okay. How could she know that?! She checked my cervix-closed. a little brown blood around the surface that she scraped and showed me. She did an ultrasound-placenta well positioned and not seperating. Baby's heart was beating. He/she moved their leg lazily. Cervix-long and thick. 4.8 inches. "look at this beautiful child," she soothed me. "Nothing could look more perfect. I could have no better news for you. Your cervix is extremely tender now, with the pressure from the growing uterus. It appears that your spotting only came from your cervix, but it's not still bleeding."
She told me to call her if I start bleeding like a period (GOD FORBID). She said this happens, but as long as everything looks healthy there's no cause for concern.
SIGH OF RELIEF. HUGE BULLET DODGED.
Today could have gone so much worse. I can't imagine losing my baby at 4.5 months.
I went home and went to bed after getting some cereal and drinking loads of water. I've been peeing ever since, and even had a BM- sorry, tmi- and there was not a bit of spotting. At all.

This baby is going to give me a heart attack!