I'm having a hard time deciding what I should do this next cycle.
I've heard so many wonderful stories about women, in my real life circle and blogland, that have conceived immediately following a m/c.
I have also read on countless sites that it is best to wait at least one cycle before trying again. This is for a few reasons, one being that it is easier to date a pregnancy once you've had a real last period-which I scoff at, since I'm pretty damn good at knowing exactly when I ovulate, and I'm not ignorant enough to think it was while I was miscarrying.
Another reason- hcg can stay in your system until your next cycle is due, resulting in positive tests and starting your period all over again, which can be devastating. I don't think there is a chance in hell of this happening to me, since I'm pretty sure my levels are back to 0 right now. My lame ass doctor hasn't called to tell me this, even though I got my last beta on thursday and it was a STAT. whatever, it was at 14 two days before.
A third reason- that your body needs time to heal. I think I miscarried so early that by the time I stop bleeding it will be just like a normal cycle. Alot of women don't even know they were pregnant at the point I was. My bleeding is already tapering, and it's been about 5 days.
A fourth reason- You need time to heal emotionally. The only way I will heal emotionally from this crapfest is getting pregnant and staying pregnant.
So what do you think? These are my arguments for trying right away. Any thoughts? The only reason I wouldn't is for fear of miscarrying a second time. Do you think it would happen again if we tried in a couple of weeks?
Seriously,though. It took me a year to get here. It probably won't happen right away anyway.
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7 comments:
I am no medical doctor (always an important disclaimer), but I know of women who've had early losses and got pregnant again right away (http://mrs.flinger.us/, for example) with no trouble. I was ordered to wait, but I was 10 weeks along and took 2 weeks to pass everything. Plus, my HCG levels were stubborn in going down. Sounds like you don't have those issues.
Just make sure you are emotionally ready. If you feel you are, I see no reason why you can't follow your heart.
I agree with everything Sara said. I was about 10 weeks too, but everything passed very quickly, and we went ahead the next cycle because no one told us not to. Everything turned out fine.
thank you girls. It's nice to know from your experiences. :) Especially when your experiences are on my side! ;)
I'm sorry to hear of your loss. I agree with both ladies. Follow your heart and go at your own pace. It will happen again.
So I'll explain my friend's success story how she now has her almost one year old daughter and it's all my fault (I'd like to claim credit, but I'm sure her DH had something to do with it). They were trying naturally for well over a year and we're starting to talk about seeing doctors when she got pregnant. She knew right when she was only four weeks along, because she was a POAS veteran like us all. She lost the baby at 5-6 weeks and was devestated. Her doctor told her to wait until she got her next period on her own, but she still wanted to try. She also wanted to start taking her BBTs. She had been just using OPKs. She asked me my opinion and how to take her temps. I explained how it all worked, helped her find the right thermometer and told her I didn't see any reason to wait a month. She could see that she ovulated when her temps went up. She called me 15 days after her temps went up and asked how long they should stay high. When she told me where she was at, I told her to go find a POAS test immediately. Of course it was positive. I think it definately worked in her favor to try right away. Lots of luck.
loren, my opinion can't be worth that much since I have not been through what you've been through--but I say go for it if you feel ready. Especially if you hear from your doc that your HcG levels are at 0. Good luck, I really hope this cycle is the one for you.
I don't have any wisdom on this comment. But, maybe you and your husband can just enjoy each others love this month without stressing soooo much on temperatures, mucus etc... I think if I was in your position, I wouldn't want to use birth control to avoid pregnancy...it would seem so wrong after 2 years of trying.
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